Goodbye Scare Academy
If you are a student at Air Academy, there is no doubt that you have seen your fair share of exciting moments brought to you by your fellow questionable “scholars” of AAHS. As my high school story comes to an end, I have definitely heard and seen many awkward, interesting, and even exciting performances put on by the student body.
After 4 years of hard-time at this government institution, I am excited beyond any comprehension that I get to leave this place. While I am leaving, a fairly young, unwise man once told me that you must always reminisce about the past and always let it impact your future. Following his wise words, let us go on a journey through time in the dark, dank halls of Air Academy.
Upon entering this school in the fall of 2014, I was immediately greeted by the feeling of rocks and God knows what else being flung towards myself and my fellow freshman as the ominous sounds of “4 more years” was being chanted in the gym by the coalition of incumbent students. The seniors, dressed in orange, were able to “obtain” multiple Colorado Springs Utility traffic cones and Home Depot shopping carts for use as equipment in their battle against the Juniors. The following celebration of the old class color days ensued chaos as the school was illustrated in red, green, yellow, and orange. As crazy as it sounds, I miss being pelted with projectiles by upperclassmen who are long gone.
The madness of freshman year was not isolated to class color days. Oh no, it actually got worse. Halloween soon followed and knowing how us krazy kadets are, you can already imagine or remember some of the costumes. During the day, I was approached by Adolf Hitler. Yes, a student dressed as Hitler and was not shy about it. What makes it even more memorable is that other students were saluting him in the Nazi fashion. The other students were more concerned that I didn’t salute him rather than the fact that somebody dressed as Hitler. There were also many other controversial costumes that were roaming the halls on Halloween that year.
I also witnessed students throwing bananas at vending machines freshman year. One banana managed to stay on top of one of them for over a week before it was removed. I also saw students color in the missing dark tiles in the ramped hallway in D building. Those with OCD were quite thankful for that act. Freshman year was definitely an exciting first start.
During my sophomore year, the students seemed quite tranquil and calm with only a few instances. While using the bathroom, a student witnessed a fellow sophomore take a chocolate milk carton, and throw it as hard as he could into the urinal. The result was a bathroom covered in chocolate milk as the smell of dairy and urine-tainted air. There was also the time second semester when I witnessed an unknown teenager run down the breezeway after taking off his long sleeve shirt to wrap it around his neck and use it as a cape. He then began to start screaming as he ran and proclaimed “I will save you all!”
Junior year rolled around and the antics started to pick back up. Quite literally on the first day, I walked into the school, ready for a new year, only to be greeted by a group of students blasting Pumped Up Kicks by Foster The People as they engaged in some weird interpretive dance. What a great start.
The librarians recall an instance where the seniors placed tens or hundreds of timers throughout the library one day before school. They explain that everyone was set to be about 4 minutes from each other and would go off just after they found the last one and turned it off. The seniors were real pranksters last year when they all parked their cars in a bizarre fashion in the parking lot to block off as much of it as possible for their senior prank. They basked in the glory of their unorganized accomplishment until Mr. Olson announced over the intercom that any cars not parked in a space would be towed.
The pinnacle of the idiocy truly shined during my Senior year. There were three different occasions where I saw kids run down the hall and slam their bodies into a locker, one of them shouting “full send!” I have also seen a student ask a teacher if they had a JUUL and if they could take a hit of it. Imagine how that one turned out. Students were especially brutal to the bathrooms this year. Between the dismantling of stall doors, using the bathroom in the sinks, and group vape sessions, the bathrooms and the poor janitors that have to clean them have seen their fair share of abuse.
With all of the controversial and ludicrous actions that are put on by our student body, it becomes very obvious as to why I am happy to leave this place. While I will miss this school, I am happy to move on. Goodbye, Air Academy. I will see you all in therapy.
Hi, my name is Jake Werner and this is my staff profile. I am a Copy Editor, the Fun Facts editor, and the editor of the Jetcast and this is my second...