The Gym:

DO wear deodorant. Nobody ever woke up and thought to themselves, “Today I want to smell the euphoric smell of onions, sweat socks and booty.” It’s honestly disgusting and on average at least two people throw up each time you skip your deodorant check and your stank lingers around your last station like the bubonic plague. Don’t stop anybody from getting their gains.

DON’T be on your phone more often than you work out. Jeez Louise people – you are going to the gym to either train or just stay in shape, not to chill on your phone and give the illusion that you are working out. It’s really annoying to be waiting for a machine and you just see someone use the machine for .2 seconds and then whip out their phone for another 2 minutes and claim that they are “resting.” Nah man, you aren’t fooling anybody, and if you want to know the truth, you should only rest for about 90 seconds between each set – anymore and you’re hurting yourself. (The only exception for being on your phone is if little old granny calls to see if you have eaten enough and to read the Jetstream Journal).

DO wipe down your machine after using it. Do I even need to elaborate?

DON’T give out your advice when nobody is asking. If you just stroll up to someone and start shelling out advice and you are not a personal trainer, then DON’T do it; it’s rude and uncalled for. The only time you should tell someone how to work out is if they ask you. If they don’t,  just keep doing you and let them do them.

DO dress appropriately. I could probably not care less if you feel comfortable in your own body and like to wear booty shorts, but I do care if you make me nauseous and uncomfortable and everybody else in the gym. Here is a friendly reminder: you won’t be getting any dollar bills here (if you know what I am saying). Also please leave your stained and tattered clothes at home because that’s just as bad.

DON’T grunt. C’mon man, this isn’t some all-male gym where you are grunting and yelling – it is completely do-able to lift heavy without grunting. But if you are really feeling a grunt, you can always whisper without having all of China hear you.

Competitions/Games:

DO be in a good mood and spirit. If you don’t feel good, then you sure as heck won’t play good. If you have trained hard and worked hard for this moment, but you aren’t performing well, it isn’t because you aren’t good, it’s because you aren’t there mentally. This is all due to the fact that you are not in a good mood. Your mental game is just as important as the physical aspect, so please always try to be in good spirits. I totally understand if you have an off day; it happens.

DON’T have poor sportsmanship. If you lose, don’t be a sore loser and not congratulate your opponent for a good game – that just makes you look like the biggest tool. If you win, don’t be a pompous jerk because you will look like and even bigger tool. Always have a good attitude win or lose and high five, bro hug and celebratory dance with style and grace.

DO cheer on your teammates. There is no “I” in team, and don’t even feed into the people saying, “Yeah there is, it’s in the ‘A’.” That’s probably the most annoying saying, said by people who aren’t good teammates. A team is a family, and cheering each other on and helping one another when they are down are a must have. If you don’t have that support and energy from your team, then you don’t have a team.

DON’T try to coddle your athlete after a loss or bad performance. Nothing is worse than performing less than your best- wait scratch that, yes there is. The worst feeling in the world is when you do bad and your parents or friends come up to you and try to cheer you up. Let your athlete calm down for a second and reflect on their performance and don’t talk to them about their game/competition until they bring it up.