I’m Lying to You; Can You Guess When?

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Does embellishing a story make it better?

This whole article I’m going to lie to you.

It’s not personal, though. I just think you’ll be more interested in a fake story instead of a real one.

From fishing tales to historical dramas, society has a habit of bending the truth in order to tell a “better” story, but does that really make a story better?

Instead of asking that question and telling you the responses, wouldn’t a game be more entertaining?

There are going to be four stories told entirely for your viewing pleasure with various amounts of credibility.

Can you figure out which ones are true and which ones are trickery?

Story 1:

“It was 2008 and I was eating Runtz. My brother and I decided to play punchies with a Hasbro Hulk Glove. I went first but my Pre-K level arm strength did nothing. His second-grade uppercut of fury, however, made waves. I slid across the floor, landing on my forehead. Two hours later, and I’m in the hospital getting stitches and thinking to myself, ‘This is the end of me. See you soon, God.’”

Story 2:

“Last summer, I found myself stuck in an abandoned McDonald’s. The Rockrimmon location had closed down years ago, and rumors had spread about alleged murders, poisoned food (no different from any other McDonald’s) and shell corporations all within the walls of that closed McDonald’s. I decided to go and check it out.

“At night, I climbed the roof around the back and found that the door on the roof was unlocked, or so I thought. I walked inside and went down. The place was mostly empty, just the shell of what used to be a McDonald’s. I explored all around and found nothing of particular interest other than some very tasteful graffiti in the kitchen. As I went back to the roof to leave, I found that the door was locked from the outside. ‘Well, poop,’ I thought.

“I inevitably found that the other doors were able to be opened from the inside, but that took an admittedly long time. Since then, I have not gone back to that not-so-cursed McDonald’s.”

Story 3:

“Full disclosure, I don’t recommend skiing off-road. It was freshman year and I was not the best skier. I stayed in Greens and occasionally rolled my way down a Blue. This time, though, I took a new lift and found myself surrounded by Black Diamonds. This was not preferred, so I tried to (and I’m not proud of this) sit on my butt and ski like I was on a sled. For anyone who knows anything about skiing, this does not work.

“I lost control immediately and actually went into the woods. Miraculously, I only kinda bumped into a tree and found myself on the other side of the trees clean on my butt. This side was so powdery that I was less worried about getting down. I skied down my savior hill for a couple of minutes before realizing I didn’t see anyone else going down my hill.

“I began to get a little anxious and soon enough I realized something: I was not skiing with anyone else. Needless to say, I ended up taking off my skis and walking across the woods for roughly twenty minutes until I found the original Black Diamond I was on. I walked down and decided I was done skiing for the day.”

Story 4:

“So my buddy and I decided to go up Blodgett last February. It was snowing pretty hard but we were bundled up fairly well and we thought we’d be fine. It was cold, but we wanted to make it to the peak, so we weren’t going to stop.

“For the first 20 minutes, we listened to Rex Orange County as we trekked up the mountain. We had been in the woods for a while when we realized the path was getting pretty icy but we still didn’t want to give up so we bore down and blasted Kanye West on the way up the mountain. First, I fell down the ice and slid a few feet down, but no stopping. Then my friend slid backward, but no stopping. Then we both slid down, there was now t he option of stopping.

“We conversed and decided to turn around; at that point, we had been going up the mountain for roughly 40 minutes. Our goal was to make it down in approximately two Kanye West tracks. “All of The Lights” blared from my speaker as we slid down the ice and ran across the path.

“We nearly fell as we ran and slid across turns and through trees down the mountain. “Ultralight Beam” began rhythmically as we found ourselves in the clearing with plenty left to go. Our lungs were burning as we hit the final stretch, but when the song concluded, my car was just a few feet away and we had made it back on time.”

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The boundary between fact and fiction can be fuzzier than you think. Photo labeled for reuse by Velizar Ivanov on Unsplash.com.

The first tale of a cracked forehead was true. The second story of going to the abandoned McDonald’s was a complete lie. The third dramatization of a skiing trip gone wrong was entirely fictional and my musical adventure was, in fact, a real event with senior Jason Lee.

Which stories did you find more entertaining: the real, or the really not?

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